Funny Jokes

H To O

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO! "!!TEACHER : What are you talking about?PAPPU : Yesterday you said its H to O !

Dant Tumhare...

Do admi lar rahe they aik bola "aik hi mukka maar kar chontees dant tor doon ga" teesra admi bola "wah sahib kiya baat hai laiken dant to battis hotey hain" "mujhay maloon tha k tum darmian mein bolo gay is liyay do dant tumhare bhi shamil kar liyay they" pehlay admi nay jawab diya.

Kelay Ka Chilka...

Aik shaks kai saal baad wattan wapis aaya.jahaz say utartey waqat wo zameen pay sajday ki halat mein gir para or zameen choomnay laga samne kharey sapahi nay us ki yay halat daikhi to socha kitna acha admi hai issay wattan ki mitti say kitni muhabbat hai k wattan puhanchtay hi sab say pehlay yahan ki mitti choom raha hai.sipahi aagey barha or garam joshi say us ka hath dabba kar kaha ap bahut mehb-e-wattan hain mein ap ki hubbulwattni ko salam kehta hoon us admi nay ghussay say kaha k pehlay batao k seerion mein kelay ka chilka kis nay phainka tha?

Car Ka Number Note...

Teen ehmak dost jin mein aik andha, aik langra or aik ganja tha, footpath pay baithay gappay maar rahe they itney mein samney say aik gari zor say guzri jis ki wajja say matti ur kar un par aai, ganjey ney apne sar per hath phair kar kaha k "mere balon ka style kharab ho gaya hai".langrey nay kaha k "kiya mein is ka peecha karoon?" is par andhey nay foran kaha "nahi nahi tumhain us ka peecha karne ki zaroorat nahi mein nay car ka number note kar liya hai."

Mbbf...

aik admi nay doosray admi say poocha k tum kahan tak parhay hoay ho doosray admi nay kaha "MBBF tak" pehley nay poocha "is ka kiya matlab hai"? dossray na jawab diya "MATRIC BAAR BAAR FAIL".

Sweater Pehan Kar...

Chota bacha bhaaga bhaaga ghar mein dakhil hoa or apni ammi say kehney laga k "ammi ammi mujhay jaldi say paisay dain mein nay kulfi layni hai". ammi nay kaha "bayta sardi par rahi hai tumhain sardi lag jaey gi bachey nay masoomiat say kaha ap fikar na karen ammi mein sweater pehan kar kha loon ga".

Talay Ki Chabi...

Aik chor kisi ghar ka tala tor raha tha ichanak us k peechay aahatt hoi us waqat tak wo tala tor chukka tha gabhra kar us nay peechay daikha to maalik mukaan ko sar par khara paya maalik mukaan nay usay pareshan daikha to tasalli daytay hoey kaha k "mian chor pareshan mat ho mein to tumhara shukkar guzzar hoon k tum nay tala tor diya asal mein mujh say talay ki chabi gum ho gai thi".

Khali Pastol...

Jungle mein aik ghareeb lakkerhara chala ja raha tha achanak jharion mein say aik dakku barrammad hoa.us nay ghareeb lakkarharey ki kanpatti per pastol rakh kar kaha "jo kuch bhi tumhare pass hai sab kuch foran niqal do lakkarharey ne miskeen si shakal bana kar kaha "mein bahut ghareeb admi hoon mere pass kuch nahi dakku nay pastol ka dabbao barhatey hoay kaha "mujh say ziada ghareeb koi nahi mein to khali pastol liyay phir raha hoon".

Daynay Ja Rahi...

Aik chiunti bhagi bhagi kaheen ja rahi thi rastey mein aik gainday nay rok kar poocha "khariat to hai itni gabrahat mein kahan bhagi ja rahi ho" chiunti nay phooli hoi sanson k darmian kaha "hathi ka accident ho gaya hai ussay char bottle khoon ki zaroorat hai mein khoon daynay ja rahi hoon".

Khud Pardaysi Hoon...

Doo baywakoof sair karney bahir niklay.Raat ka waqat tha.Aik baywaqoof nay asmaan pay chand ko chamakta paya to doosray baywaqoof say poocha "Yea asmaan pay gol gol kiya chamak raha hai?" dossray baywaqoof nay masoomiat say jawab diya "mujhay kiya maloom mein to khud pardaysi hoon".

Mera Basta Bhi...

Aik ghar mein chor ghuss aaey or tammam maal band kar lay janey lagey ichanak aik chotey bachey ki ankh khul gai wo foran bola "mera basta bhi lay jao warna mein shor macha kar ghar walon ko jaga doon ga".

Branch Manager...

Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he does this. Sardar:"I have been promoted as branch manager."

You Will Go To Jail...

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".

Why Are Others Running...

Sardar : why are all these people running?Man: This is a race, the winner will get the cup.Sardar: If only the winner will get the cup, why are others running?

I Was Only Chewing Gum

Two men were facing each other on the train. First man : I know my hearing is not that good, but I never thought this would happen. I must have gotten stone deaf. Here you have been talking to me for an hour and I can not hear a word.Second man : I was not speaking. I was only chewing gum.

She Didnot Say Anything...

A mother and daughter were doing dishes while the father and son were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The son turned to look at his father. Son : It is mummy! Father : How do you know? Son : She didnot say anything.

I Am Scolding You Now..

Mother : David, come here. David : Yes, mum? Mother : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse. David : But I will only get my report book tomorrow. Mother : I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now.

You Donot Know My Father

Teacher : Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have? Ted : $10. Teacher : You donot know maths. Ted : You donot know my father!

Stupid Phone Call

One day a man was going on the street. He met a man who asked him what had happened to his ears as both ears covered with bandages.

He said: "I was ironing my clothes when the phone bell rang. Instead of picking up the phone, i pick up the iron, so i burnt my ear."

The man asked "So what happened to your other ear?"

He said "That same stupid guy called again"