Funny Jokes

Sardar Jee Or Jannat

Sardar Jee chupkay se jahanum se niklay aur jannat mai chale gayeFristay nay pakar ker khoob maraSardar Jee uthe or bolye: Tuhadi ena harkatan tu koi jannat vich nahi anda...

Sardar Or Pani

Sardar sokhy howay derya main kashti challa raha tha Dosra sardar dekh ker bola Aisey he sardaron ki waja sey hamara name kharab howay hym ager mjy swiming attitu main ja ker osy boht marta

Judge Sahab Or Dentist

Aik judge sahab daaNt nikalwanay k liyeh dentist ki kursi par bai Thnay lagay to jaisay on hai N kuch yaad aayaa. fauran dentist say bolay:
Pahlay yeh halaf uThao k tum daaNt aur sirf daaNt nikalogay. daaNt k sewa kuch naheeN nikalogay.

Aik dentist ki car maiN kuch kharabi hogayee. aas pass koi mechanic naheeN thaa. khud hi plas lay kar aik nut kholnay k liyeh jhukay aur saath hi saath Bar baRa ay:
dekho bhai ... ghabraanaa naheeN.... thoRi see takleef to hogi lekin phir araam aajayega.

Flower Wali Plate

biwi=jao kitchen mein say flower wali plate le ker aoshohar kitchen mein dhondta hoa wapis ata hayshohar=begam mujay nahin milibiwi=mujhay pehlay hi pata tha kay tumhay nahin milay gi isi waja se mein pehlay hi utha lai thi

Kia Kaar Mein Kharabi Hay

trafik k sipaahi ne aik choti s car atay daikhi,,,hairat ki baat ye thi k wo waqfay waqfay se kuch uper uth rahi thi,,,sipaahi ne car roki jisay aik bohat mota aadmi chala raha tha,aur us se poocha
"kia kaar mein kharabi hay?"
driver bola " je nahi der asal mujhay hichkiyan a rahi hein."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
aik aadmi ghabraaya hua police station per aaya inspector se bola.mujhay arrest ker lijiyay mein ne apni bivi k ser per laathi maari hayinspector: kia mer gai hay?aadmi: Nahin...! ab wo wohi laathi liyay mairay peechay a rahi hay.....

Sardar Jee Or Doctor

Sardar jee building se gira or behosh hogayaDoctor says: He is dead. Everyone crying suddenly he wakeup and says oye mai zinda wa.. Sardarni: Chup ker pyare tenu doctor nalu bohta pata...

Aik Aadmi Dosri Shaadi Karta Hai

aik aadmi dosri shaadi karta hai
aur iske pehle se 2 bachay hotay hain
aur jis aurat se shaadi karta hai uske bhi pehle se 2 bachay hotay hain
aur phir baad main in ke 2 bachay aur ho jatay hain
phir aik din begam apne shoher ko phone karti hain
aur kehti hain
sunain aapke bachay aur mere bachay mil ke
humare bachon ko maar rahe hain

Aik Salesman

aik salesman aik ghar mein ja kar door knock karta hai.darwaza khulta hai aur woh aik dam gobar(cow dung) carpet per phaink deta hai.
aur kehta hai keh" agar mera vaccum cleanar es ko 5 minute mein jaado ki tarah saaf na kar day to mein yeh gobar yahan aap k saamnay khaaoon ga.
lady says tum es k saath chatnii lo gay ya ketchup??salesman says why??
lady says we r having load shedding for next 5 hours.

Sardar Or Pathan

aik sardar jee sardiyon ke dinon main motorbike per jarahe thay.unki jacket ke buttons
tootay huye thay.unhon ne jacket ko ulta karke pehan lia.yani peechay ki side se khul gai
jacket.
aur uske baad unki bike gir gai.loog door door se shor sun ke bhagtay huye aaye.
to wahan aik pathan khara hua tha aur sardar zameen per paray thay.
pathan ne bataya ke inki gardan peechay hogai thi accident se lekin jab se maine zor laga ke
seedhi ki sardar jee kuch bol nahin rahay

Sardar Or Frog

sardar ka dimagh nahi hota.Sardar: Hota hay.FROG: nahi hota-nai hota-nahi hota(& jumps in water)Sardar: Lay-Das! eday wichkhudkushi karnde kerri gal c..?

Ferrari Or Totaa

Ek baar ek Totaa (Bole to Parrot ) Ud Raha tha full speed par ...
Uske Saamne full speed me ek Ferrari AA rahi thi ..
Dono ki takkar hui ...
Totaa Behosh ...
Raste me Ek Beggar tha
Usne Tote ko uthaya aur Ghar Le gaya ..
Usko Marham lagaya ..
Aur Pinjare me rakh diya ..
Jab Tote ko hosh aaya ...
Usne apne aap ko Pinjare me dekha ...........
..
....
Bola ........
"AAILA ... JAIL .... Who Ferrari ka Driver mar gaya kya ??

Planet

A kid gets 0 marks in papper father angirly says what is this ??? kid replies: Teacher k pass stars khatam ho gae the to PLANET dena shuru ker diye.

Shadi K Baad

MERE AIK DOST KI NAI NAI SHADI HUI THEE AIK DIN USS NE APNI BIWI KO AS USUAL APNE HE KHAYALOON MEIN GUM PAYA TOU USS SE POOCHA K KIA BAAT HAI DEAR! SHADI K BAAD TUM KUCH KHOI KHOI SEE REHTI HO?
BIWI GHABRA KAR BOLI! JEE NAHIN JEE AISI TOU KOI BAAT NAHIN MEIN TOU SHADI SE PEHLE BHE KHOTI THEE.

3 Saal Guzarney Hain

aik kanjoos aadmi ka beta EXAM main pass ho gia
ghar pohnch kar dady ko good news bataee to woh
apney bachay ko peetney laga aur saath
kehnay laga >>>>
kaha bhi tha keh in kitabon sey tu ney
3 saal guzarney hain

Sundar Laal Chaddaa

Teacher : Sanjay...!! whts ur fathers name ..??Sanjay : Beautyful red Under wear....
Teacher : wht nonsense name .... !! U shud xplain the Meaningz....
Sanjay : Sundar laal chaddaa....

Teacher To Pathaan

Teacher to pathaan,,,,,,,,,,, qatil kisey kehtey hain ???
pathaan............. mujhey nahi pata ....!!!
Teacher................agr tum apney baap ka khoon kar do tou log tum ko kya kahain gey...???

pathaan................. yateem.....!!!

**********

Assassination Ki Spelling

Ek teacher class II ke bachon ko kuch yun parha rahi hoti hain
" Gadha Gadhay ke peechay ek or Gadha Gadhay ke peechay Mai or mere peechay pori qoom "
School ki headmistress round per hoti hain woh class me enter ho kar teacher se kehti hain
Madam : Aap ye bachon ko kya parha rahi hain?
Teacher : Madam me bachon ko asaan tareeke se ASSASSINATION ki spelling yaad karwa rahi hon

Aik Shayer [Poet ]

Aik shayer [poet ]aik shakhs ko maarney [ peetney] ki gharzsey haath main chharhi liay us kay peechhay bhag raha tha.rush ki wajah sey aglay aadmi ki raftaar kam ho gaee.aur shayer us tak pohnch gaya abhi maarney hi wala tha keh kisi ney us ka haath pakarh liya aur poochha kehkion marna chahtey ho issay to kehnay laga keh yeh shakhs
Apna shair suna kar bhaag gia haiaur mera nahi sunta

Pathan Apni Biwi Se

AiK raat Light chale Gaye
Pathan Apni Biwi Se: Oye Kam Se Kam PanKha Tu ChaLa De
Biwi: Kardi Na Phir Pathano waLe Baat
PanKha ChaLe Ga Tu Moombati Nahi Bujh Jaye Gi